Tweet Tactician Gifts

'Sir, your tweeting coach is here.'

"I have the new list of approved tweets."

'Whatever Mrs Widdlington wants I need you to sort it out immediately...she's got 34,000 followers on Twitter.'

'Twitter is throwing open the whole world of libel to a radical rethink...'

"I just tweeted a chirp."

Bird Calls

"I haven't been in any academic journals but I do get my Tweets re-Tweeted a lot."

Trump Aims Twitter Missiles at Iran

CS560692"He's a prolific publisher on Twitter."

"To-do list. Item one. Clear up the world's problems masterful tweet."

"I want conventional and nuclear battle plans on my desk. It's time to take this Twitter war to the next level."

Tweeter's Block

'Looks like your cash cow just got diverted to the slaughterhouse.'

Kitchen Tetris

"It's Dr. Sadie. Go ahead, caller." "Yeah, how come you haven't said 'Merry Christmas' yet?" "Oh, that’s because I was hoping to provoke everyone who’s upset about the so-called 'war on Christmas' to spend all their time on hold waiting to castigate me. That way, all the normal people who don’t think Christmas is just another chance to play the victim can open their gifts in peace." "You're welcome, America." "Why haven't you played 'Jingle Bells' yet?"

"Well I didn't see the incident myself.."

'So far, sir, we've rejected plans A,B, C, D, E, F, and right now we're evaluating'G'.'

'Now listen: Based on the position of the kennel and the length of the leash, only the shaded part of the garden is dangerous...'

"That was a rumor day."

Man and bird

'I wish i could think of some way to get away form him.' 'I wish i could think of some way to get away form her.'

"I know I told you to fool him into thinking you've got nothing left, but now you've got me convinced."

'Remember, shares can also go down...'

"The answer isn't more troops—what you need is an antibiotic."

"It has come to my attention that there's a traitor in our midst."

Manager. Managing a political campaign and a baseball team are alike in many ways. A campaign is launched with a "first pitch," when a candidate gives a speech selling himself or herself. I change pitchers based on the game situation. In politics and baseball, sometimes it's best to come from the right side and sometimes it's best to come from the left side. We study our competitors' weaknesses and exploit those. In politics we call that "opposition research." And I don't worry about the

'Thank you colonel we'll keep your strategy in mind.'

"We're fighting them in zone A, they're our allies in zone B, and we don't know what to do in zone C."

'Man, I can't believe we didn't think of this before.'

Arsene Wenger

Stone Age

This Amount of Computer Code

Keeper giving Lords best position for shooting

Kamakasi pilot instructor

'I don't know about you, Sam, but so far my clients aren't going for this cross between tradtional and online trading.'