Seaside Satirist Gifts

"The food is great, but the service is terrible."

"It was a lovely holiday. The chips crispy and delicious, the ice cream cornets were to die for, the only downside being, the hostility of the humans, who were reluctant to share their sustenance."

'I am wearing my bikini!'

'Oh, come on - If you're gonna mess up my castle, take the whole thing.'

'This is totally bananas!'

'Up periscope!'

The Domestic Violence Workshop Commences At 2:30.

"Actually, I used them as collateral for a loan."

Castro's successful invasion of miami beach.

Suburban street.

Scene on the English coast.

Bed of Nails on Holiday

'I think your pot has roasted.'

"There's nothing wrong with the ship. We just got a better offer."

'Aren't you supposed to drop the clam on the rock?'

Another Disappointment for Captain Ahab

'Is this the way to the beach?'

I suppose you're wondering why I summoned you, minion. Not really, boss. I've noticed a disturbing trend: Bikinis are getting smaller and smaller. So small, in fact, that they no longer hid anything. I think it's about time our caf

'Sorry, ocean sounds can't be heard due to a computer glitch.'

'That's what I call riding the barrel!'

'I'll trade you three eight-inch shiners for that 24-inch bass.'

'The double codpiece and chips is very popular with the Blackpool crowd, your highness.'

'The gannets are worse than the gulls!'

"Please listen carefully as our menu options have changed..."

'Goodness me referee one really must question your visual acuity.'

"OY! You trying to nick my chips?"

". . . And if we all look to our left, we can see exactly what we saw an hour ago."

'Ramming speed sailor.'

How to fool a seagull

Surfing the Brown Water.

"Of course it's not safe. That's why I'm here."

"Three Morons At Sea."

New Season's Bathing Machines

"You and me open a chip shop. Whaddaya say?"

Pirate points to Plank Walking notice nailed to mast,