Seaside Satirist Pillows

"The food is great, but the service is terrible."

"It was a lovely holiday. The chips crispy and delicious, the ice cream cornets were to die for, the only downside being, the hostility of the humans, who were reluctant to share their sustenance."

'I am wearing my bikini!'

'Oh, come on - If you're gonna mess up my castle, take the whole thing.'

'This is totally bananas!'

'Up periscope!'

The Domestic Violence Workshop Commences At 2:30.

"Actually, I used them as collateral for a loan."

Castro's successful invasion of miami beach.

Suburban street.

Scene on the English coast.

Bed of Nails on Holiday

'I think your pot has roasted.'

"There's nothing wrong with the ship. We just got a better offer."

'Aren't you supposed to drop the clam on the rock?'

Another Disappointment for Captain Ahab

'Is this the way to the beach?'

'That's what I call riding the barrel!'

'Sorry, ocean sounds can't be heard due to a computer glitch.'

'The double codpiece and chips is very popular with the Blackpool crowd, your highness.'

'I'll trade you three eight-inch shiners for that 24-inch bass.'

How to fool a seagull

". . . And if we all look to our left, we can see exactly what we saw an hour ago."

'The gannets are worse than the gulls!'

"Please listen carefully as our menu options have changed..."

'Ramming speed sailor.'

"OY! You trying to nick my chips?"

Surfing the Brown Water.

"Of course it's not safe. That's why I'm here."

"Three Morons At Sea."

'Last week he gave me artificial recreation.'

"I see you're still lacking in confidence!"

"May I recommend Deborah, she has a perfect blend of Merlot and chocolate."

And today's winner of a special place in Hell is...Guys who wear bikini style bathing suits to the beach...

'POSTED! TOPLESS BATHERS ONLY BEYOND THIS POINT!'