Prison Shows Gifts

'I said there is a F-I-L-E in the C-A-K-E!'

Prisoners.

'No air conditioning? - I don't see how you stand it in there!'

"My problem is a recessive gene for honesty and a dominant gene for robbery."

I'm worried about Uncle Mort. He's still in jail for refusing to reveal his secret source? Not just that. It's his relationship with Sadie. I feel like … What? She says she wants him back, but I'm not sure. Why would you say something like that? Your sweetie made you a saw with a cake in it. Oooh.

'Let's get a kitty.'

"Hide the file in one of your gluten-free cakes – so the guards won't eat it."

Visitation Day at the Bug Jar

'One of the guards is leaiving, would you like to make a contribution to his farewell gift?'

Prisoner decorating his cell.

'Yes, Frank, yes. That's how my body will fall when you kill me, and your laughter will echo down the corridors...'

'Before you go to prison, Sims, I'd like to give you this award as 'Scapegoat of the Year'.'

'It's windy this morning.'

'I'm getting into a rut -- campaign, election, indictment, parole... campaign, election, indictment, parole....'

"You're doing 20-to-life. What do you mean you haven't got time to floss?"

Guys in torture chamber: 'TGIF!' and 'Shaddup.'

'Well, I'd best be off, Arthur, the clink of glasses behind bars and all that...'

"I had everyone fooled. Could have got away with it, too, if he had just kept his big mouth shut."

"I got eight to twelve years, which was in line with Wall Street expectations."

'Ms. Daly, have there been any important e-mails or voice-mails during my incarceration?'

'When I first saw you on TV, I just knew you were innocent of stalking.'

'Thanks, but I don't need a lawyer. I'm going to tell the truth.'

Exercise yard: 'It's windy this morning!' (Arrows on uniform all blowing away).

Identity theft. You?

Prison decorating

'Don't worry, I didn't tell them anything they didn't already suspect.'

'Look on the bright side, think of all the money you saved by conducting your own defence.'

'I'm a celebrity now...so get me out of here!'

'Yes, you look stunning. Can I put the mirror down now?'

"For God's sake man, give it a break. You were an accountant!"

WARDEN, 'You're a bad influence around here, Murdock!'

Lawyer to prisoner- It's stopped raining, I'll be going,

Prison Library: Do Not Press The Escape Key On Prison Computers.

"Good news, the breakout's on tonight!"

"Ever walk into a room and forget why you're there?"