Organic Retailer Gifts

'You don't use chemicals, do you?'

'Enjoy your meal! We grow everything ourselves!'

The Environmentalist

"Even the waiters here are organic."

The Endless Battle of the Organic Gardener

But is it organic?

"We're odd looking but just as good."

At the market

Eco Princess

A corner market is taken over by suburban sprawl.

Institute of Health next to Alternative medicine dept

'You may not feel any healthier right away, but you'll definitely feel more smug.'

"You ordered the organic, unprocessed, whole wheat spaghetti?"

'Gosh, I dunno. You sure it's organic?'

"Mulch madness"

"Being vegan or vegetarian isn't enough anymore. From now on I will only cook stuff I stepped in on the sidewalk."

'You're still keen on organic gardening then!'

'Don't worry it's organic...'

'Want a mudpie? It's organic!'

Sorry, I only eat organic, fair-trade, shade-grown, biodynamic, raw dirt.

The Organic

'Who says you're not genetically manipulated?'

'Make it a microbrew, Jake! I've gone organic!'

"Hold on. If we're free range, I don't think we should be crossing a toll road."

"You'll find that as a restaurateur I've worked hard to showcase the finest in organic and free range ingredients that have been harvested and prepared in authentic and traditional ways."

Bio-Engineered Fruit of the Month Club

Stuffing the turkey.

"I say we settle around here, there's no chemical aftertaste to the soil: Must be an organic farmer..."

'Is it organic?'

"You want organic, we'll make it organic."

Attack of the 'health' foods

Supermarket Aisles: 'Good for the Environment' and 'Couldn't give a flying F@$#! about the environment!'

'What do you have that hasn't been cloned?'

"Waiter, can you find out if this hair in my arugula salad is locally harvested?"

'Because we're still part of society - that's why we have to go organic.'