Organic Lover Gifts

Health Shops

'Does any of your bread just have bread in it?'

I'm not buying a $25 set of boring hooded towels off a big box store baby shower registry. Mom fights the man! The local baby boutique will have a hipper selection. So true! Catch those adorable all-organic, artist-designed towels! Cute! And only $55 each! My pretentions are never cheap!

GMOs

Now With Organic Artifical Additives

'Want a mudpie? It's organic!'

"I'm going to a concert by a really famous superstar....he deserves to be pelted with expensive organic tomatoes!"

"...and into each box, we now put a tiny amount of antidote to counteract all the additives."

"I'm not feeling well. I'm picking up a few things at my pharmacy."

"I would like organic milk!"

One reason why bio-tech agribusiness are very glas that their genetically-altered produce can't talk: "Moooo!"

'Enjoy your meal! We grow everything ourselves!'

The Environmentalist

"Even the waiters here are organic."

But is it organic?

Eco Princess

At the market

See you at the farmers market!

A corner market is taken over by suburban sprawl.

"The previous tenant was a bit of a shut-in."

'Perfect. Do you deliver?'

"Just a couple of ninety cent seed packets, and you can have fresh garden vegetables for heaven knows how long."

Institute of Health next to Alternative medicine dept

'You may not feel any healthier right away, but you'll definitely feel more smug.'

"You ordered the organic, unprocessed, whole wheat spaghetti?"

'Gosh, I dunno. You sure it's organic?'

"Oh, no - not another farmer's market!"

"Being vegan or vegetarian isn't enough anymore. From now on I will only cook stuff I stepped in on the sidewalk."

"Mulch madness"

'My owner is feeding me way too much organic food.'

'You're still keen on organic gardening then!'

Bio-Engineered Fruit of the Month Club

Sorry, I only eat organic, fair-trade, shade-grown, biodynamic, raw dirt.

"Hold on. If we're free range, I don't think we should be crossing a toll road."

'Make it a microbrew, Jake! I've gone organic!'