Mafia Intrigue Gifts

"Vinnie, it's time we send our 'friend' a little message."

"Don't make me warn you again, monkey. Stay outa the curiosity racket."

"Maybe our beloved founder is trying to tell us something."

'Sure, we pay them for protection but there are unexpected bonuses: nobody can tenderise veel like Luigi or slice beef as fine as Vinny.'

"All I can figure is that he must have been inspecting the water quality of our lakes and rivers when he became entangled in cement."

'This is a personal insult to me and my family. Paulie, word is you regifted that horse's head I gave you last month. . .'

"I did, boss, I swear, I buried him myself."

Cosa Nostradamus: "Listen, you mook. I predict if you don't pay the vig to the Don by tonight you'll be at the bottom of the Hudson by morning."

"Daddy, can I have a pony killed?"

This is your last warning, Jimmy - You break your pinky promise, we break your pinky.

'Did you get the hit man Frankie?'

"Encouraging dissent is a good way of finding out who the traitors are."

'Relax... When I said, your husband's swimming with the fishes. I merely meant that he's gone SCUBA diving with the boss.'

Why did the chicken cross the mafia

"Pretty good day. I wasn't linked to anything incriminating."

"Better idea! Let's obstruct traffic in the guy's neighborhood and make his morning commute difficult!"

'When did mum stop just sending us to our room?'

The Mafia isn't what it used to be...

"Who, Big Sal? Sure, we were in cahoots years ago, but we fell out of cahoots."

"Make it look like natural selection."

'Hi. I'm Don.'

The Godfather Sends Chess Master Bobby Fischer a Message. . .

Raffia Mafia - "Vinny, there's some nice baskets comin' in through Queens."

Two cosa nostra gangsters sipping tea.

The Dark Side of the Lone Ranger

'Help! Miami Beach Mafiosi attack!'

Her brother's on the building opposite with an M16.

Whacked music.

UN agreements.

"Now that's what I call organised crime!"

"Psst. Can you keep a secret?"

The Wrath of the Godfather of Ventriloquism

Track'em Whack'em

"Now you will be the accountant to the fishes."

"You should know by now, nobody puts the bite on me and gets away with it!"