Lost Tourist Gifts

'When we get to the middle will you then admit your sat nav is useless?'

"Damn. I think I missed the turn for Bethlehem."

Mall Directory: You aren't here x - where the heck are you?

The Lost World: You are Here

'Now Featuring Gas-Fired Microwave Campfires!'

"We have all the brochures, but we can't decide if we want to die on Mt. Everest or Mt. McKinley."

'Why, thank you. When they started the vineyard five generations ago, I heard they were shooting for freakin' awesome.'

"Oh no! Oh no! Oh no! Oh no!"

"Where’s your sense of Gothic romance?"

"Caught another one!" "Let's eat!"

'Must be the lesser known Easter Egg Island.'

'I told you not to rely on the sat-nav.'

'It's not a desert island - it's Australia.'

"It was rated on all the travel websites. 'Best economy tour'."

"Look on the GPS to see if there's any wormholes through time and space."

'Wow, they don't make trees like they used to.'

"Dunno...they all look the same to me..."

'At least, Men point cameras at you these days: In my day, they pointed guns!'

I'm a gangster rap fan too!

Portalouvre

"I could have sworn Arizona was landlocked."

Easter Island Rock Climber

'Will you stop yelling save the whales and finish you pina colada?'

At this exact location on May 23rd 1957, a bunch of people mounted this plaque to commemorate a surplus of funding for the Commemorative Plaque Society.

A tourist sees that every sign leads the right way.

Of course, Hal rented a car with economy gps.

"Aren't you going to ask me if I've forgotten anything?"

"This tribe doesn't live totally off the grid. They're selling T-shirts off their website, and they have a huge social media following."

Limbo Day at the Palace

"So this is where it all ends up. . ."

'Charlie makes a game of everything.'

'THIRTY BILLION? It only cost us three hundred to get away out here!'

You're Here. Man, You Really Look Like An Idiot!