Gloves Guru Gifts

'You're going to have to take the fight to him.' 'Aye! Find out where he lives.'

"Counsel for prose is overruled. Poetry, you may continue."

Adhesive Tiles: Do Not Open from this End.

'Hi, Miss Henderson, we did collage in class today. Can you drive me home?'

"But if you change your system preferences to match mine, is it really love?"

"Forget sugar and spice and everything nice. I'm going for buns of steel!"

The Optician At Home: "....And it didn't fit the other sister, either. Then Cinderella tried on the glasses, and she could see perfectly."

'I think he's doing ok, the coach says he has the attention span of a goldfish.'

"Careful! He knows computers."

"I've had these glasses since I was a kid, when my doctor told me I'd grow into them..."

"Objection! Pummelling the witness."

'Apparently it's part of the evolutionary process!'

'Don't blame the lawyer!'

'The other kids at school say I might need glasses, Dad.'

'I wish you would update your presentation software so we could do away with the 3-D glasses.'

Michael Jackson: The thriller of entertainment.

"If it's nothing serious' why did you put on five pairs of gloves?"

'I don't know about this new computer inventory system. It just ordered a thousand left handed four fingered surgical gloves.'

'You forgot your glasses again, didn't you?'

''Not guilty'? -- oh, in denial, are we?'

'Your direction is good! Now try for distance.'

'Tell the truth: does this affidavit make me look fat?'

'To find out how to start your new mobile, please read the manual. T' read the manual, please start your mobile.

CONGRATULATIONS On an awesome swim

Deregulated Baseball

'I'm thinking about laser eye surgery.'

Super glue . . .

'Crikey, you've got to have good eye-sight to look through those glasses, haven't you?'

"Your problem isn't the prescription."

'Don't worry...you'll grow into them.'

Pay Cut for QCs: 'I put it to you that this strikes at the very foundations of justice!'

'Nicely done. You may have double-vision, but it's 20-20, 20-20.'

"Everybody says that without the specs I look like Grover Cleveland and with them I look like Theodore Roosevelt."

Boxing

"Now, you show me yours"