Foodie With Allergies Pillows

"The chef will accommodate gluten-free requests, but only with a note from your doctor."

"Wow! So you think my chronic self-hatred may just be an undiagnosed case of lactose intolerance?"

"Oh, it's alright. You couldn't know that I'm honey-intolerant."

'Snap, crackle, help! I'm lactose intolerant!'

"Mouse? No. They contain cheese and I'm lactose intolerant."

The Nihilist Deli.

"Excuse me, Father...is the host gluten-free?"

"I'm taking you off two of the four food groups."

'Gretel, she's lying. It's not gluten free!'

'It's getting harder every day to make a living at this.'

'Do you have a traditional Christmas dinner, but for a lacto-vegan fruitarian?'

Gluten-free Santa

"If you eat gluten, we have a ton of it in the back."

"Everything on the menu can be prepared with no gluten, standard gluten, or extra gluten."

Squirrel in tree with t-shirt saying ''may contain nuts.'

'Do you, Freddie Finicky, promise to eat all your dinners up?'

"Happy Birthday, dear! It's gluten-free, lactose-free and sugar-free."

'It's gluten-free or free range or something. Enjoy.'

"I was the first one to work completely gluten free."

"No, we don't sell gluten-free gluten."

"Are there nuts in this?"

'Whatever diet they're on, tell them what they ordered is perfect for them.'

"So, it's Gluten free, lactose free and meat free. How does it taste?"

The Gluten is Free. RUN!

'Why didn't you say you were Lactose intolerant in the first place?'

We Honor Major Credit Cards and Most Dietary Restrictions

"Back inside, Bernie! The buffet is full of shrimp, pork and ham!"

"It might taste a little different. It's gluten-free slop."

Gluten-Free Church

"It's the gluten-free edition."

"None of our items are gluten-free, but they are prepared by people who are."

"It's too bad you're allergic to nuts."

"What? I have a nut allergy."

"It's gluten/carb/fat/preservative/sugar-free. Enjoy your Celery Supreme."