Farm Life Storyteller Gifts

'I guess everything's okay, doc, two legs is showing, one out of each hole."

"The good old days of eating the washing off the line are all gone methinks: The farmer has bought an electric dryer..."

Cow Pinatas

'It's not easy being green on grass!'

'Do you think he's ready for the big round-up?'

Don't be fooled by the theatrics. She'll only suck your sap!

I'm prepared to admit that you may have startled me a bit, sure!

Support group for sheep.

'Boy, watch out for that pursestring suture!'

Sheep dog late for work

'Trickle or Spray!?'

Cow talking to dog: 'What...You eat your own...?!'

Amusement Park Fun (Country Style).

'She barely made it out of the atmosphere... next!'

'Call me in the morning. In the afternoon, I'm out in the field.'

Dedication to excellence....

"Static cling."

Playing pig

"You say that using a colicky horse to pull you out of the mud may actually help his colic?"

You complete me!

No, I don

'Bless You.'

'I guess you might call it a sort of penicillin reaction.'

'I think I'm lactose intolerant.'

'Where's my glove?'

'...doomed...from here...to eter...nity...'

Farmer chasing alien leaving crop circles.

Twitter that!

"You're living in a fantasy world, Nelly. Farmer Dave doesn't know you're alive. Plus, he's a human being, he's married, he's the church pastor and he's secretly gay."

"If I ever meet an ostrich I'm going to buy it a drink."

"Bet she says 'moo' before she says 'oink'."

'A Vertical Take-off Cow'.

'You knew all the time that we were inseparable.'

You must un-learn bowel control!

Cheesie Rider