Fantasy Narrative Enjoyer Gifts

'Well, now we know why Dracula's been getting all the girls lately.'

"Too bad about old Ainsworth. Published and published, but perished all the same."

THE PIED PIPER OF GRAMERCY PARK

'That's not really what I meant by 'let your hair down', Rapunzel.'

"It's a heck of a tale...and well told, but we don't publish resumes."

Swan Fairy Tales

A fairy with wand and crown in pink tutu

"I'm not here to slay you. I'm here to talk to you about diversifying your investment portfolio."

"Once upon a time, there was a princess who wasn't about to take anyone's sh*t."

'Are you made of sugar?'

"Well, what did you expect? They were both missing vital organs."

A Fairytale Update

"I got super baked in the shire and accidentally recruited these four little weirdos for the most important mission of all time."

'Me, I don't spend my pocket money: I hoard it...'

Fairy Library - Frontispiece to Jack and the Beanstalk

Dragon Hair-dryer.

"If I can't ask for more wishes, how about more genies?"

"Actually, it is a bad time — I’m rushing to get the kids out of the oven."

ET Mishap

"We're pleased to announce that your company has shrewdly traded a cow for some magic beans." some ma

"If you really want independence, you should get into contract law."

"My, grandma, what a big nose you have! Let's take a little off the sides."

"No Frodo, we are still many leagues from Mordor. This is from a wildfire by I-5 west of Bakersfield."

The Mouse Princess

The Seven Dwarfs After Therapy

"Snow White! It's the dancing, singing woodland creatures wondering if you want to go down the pub."

Password Error: Snow White and the seven dwarfs not recognised as eight characters.

Rapunzel in the Morning

"Whosoever slays this dragon may marry the princess."

"Where the wild things were."

A bridge builder using an organic blow torch.

Through the Looking Glass - Queen Alice with Frog

"Fee-fi-fo-fum, I smell Thursday's gluten-free lasagna!"

"It that it? I don't have my contacts in."

Cat with Lion reflection in mirror