Elder Couple Gifts

"What's this? 51 shades of grey?!"

Do you mind if we stop calling this a "starter house" now?

"Oh indeed I did: I went feral for a year when I was young. It taught me a lot about the world, but about myself too..."

Albert & Myra - The End Story

"You'd think he hated music by the way he tortures it."

"Happy birthday, dear. You still have that sparkle in your eyes!" "That sparkle burned out years ago. These are cataracts."

"No, I don't want to live forever, but I damn sure don't want to be dead forever, either."

"Wish I could do that." "Better give him a dog treat and a bath first."

"You're crappin' in the closet again, Claude."

"Hey. Whatever happened to our sexual relations? "

"I can't stay in this hospital bed too long. Everyone will think I'm too old...too fragile...ready for the home. I'm not ready for that!"

"I'm ready to go whenever you're through fussing with tablescapes."

"Do let me know if I'm getting in the way, won't you?"

"My husband Frank still has all his own teeth...he keeps them in that jar over the fireplace!"

"I remembered that time you said you wished you had a biographer."

"The Lord brings people together for reasons only he knows."

Snow & Flo series: Wedding guests.

"At our age I'd say we have about two or three binge watches left in us."

'Come die with me.'

"At my age, your legs and bowels begin to go."

"We missed Fashion Week!"

"Would you like to hear tonight's specials, or have you already closed yourselves to new experiences?"

'I'll see your Social Security Supplement and raise you Medicare and a Canadian pharmacy ID.'

"These are all my financial papers - with the exception of the codes to my secret Swiss bank accounts, of course."

"Alexa...order my shopping!"

"My doctor said I have 'a reptile dysfunction.'"

"Holy smoke. What kind of frosting is that?"

"You got this, Nana."

"My wife - is she still staring at me?"

"How can back to back be your favourite position?"

"Well, sometimes we take the dogs for a walk...which puts our fitness level at approximately that of an 80-year-old couple."

"I remember when you used to kiss me under the mistletoe."

"Do you think we're a storybook romance transformed into a textbook case?"

'She's left herself go: She has barnacles everywhere now...'

"It's chirp, chirp, chirp time again, isn't it?"