Older Couple Gifts

The Couple who Adopted an Adult Child

'Memory loss has certainly made wife-swapping a lot easier hasn't it Jack. Walter. Whatever your name is.'

"Margaritas?"

'Are you sure you still love me even though I'm old, and everything just hangs now?'

Old elephants.

"You're old, you're losing fluid and now you're breaking down...I better have you scrapped."

"Actually, the volcano is dormant. Shall I have her call you back?"

"Forty years ago on this very seat I proposed to you. Made up your mind yet?"

"Herbert... do we have anything interesting to harken back to?"

Snow & Flo series: Wedding guests.

'Well so far I don't see a down side to the 'empty nest'.'

'I realise now that your body's obsolescence was planned, all planned right from the start.'

"Man, your old lady really is an old lady"

'Used to be 'Rock around the Clock', now is it 'Limp Around the Block'?'

'I know that we once made a list of all the things we'd do when the kids left home but I can't remember one of them!'

Couple on a Tandem Cycling in Different Directions

"Make a wish, dear, and smile!"

"If I ever say anything I haven't said already, let me know."

"In the first place, it isn't "maddening crowd.' It's 'madding crowd.' "

Cry babies.

'I had my attorney draw this up. It states that if I choose to rise, I don't necessarily have to shine.'

"In lieu of a pre-nup we decided just to label everything."

"And do you, Deborah Tannen, think they know what they're talking about?"

"It was years ago, for a nature documentary, and they said it was going to be very artistic."

Couples' therapy

"The yellow spotted green bird, eats its body weight in bugs, and mates once every three years."

"Since we're both being honest, I should tell you I have fleas."

His Her Cakes

"You'd think he hated music by the way he tortures it."

'Come on, you can make it work! You're supposed to be Lovebirds after all...'

"What's going on Jen? Why didn't you respond to my kissing emoji?"

"Who told the quartet to play 'Highway to Hell'?"

'...honestly I just feel like we don't communicate like we used to!'

'We'd just like to get away from all leading economic indicators for a while.'

"... And to this day, she still blames the dog!"