Elderly Couple Friends Gifts

"I knew you was mad when you tried to sell me to them "American Pickers" fellers."

Help! I'm ROFL and ICGU!

Albert & Myra - The End Story

"Why bother?"

'You know you're getting old when you take longer to recover than to get tired.'

"You'd think he hated music by the way he tortures it."

"I used to drink to forget. Now, age-related, short-term memory loss takes care of that for me."

"Happy birthday, dear. You still have that sparkle in your eyes!" "That sparkle burned out years ago. These are cataracts."

"I can remember when a dollar was worth $47.32."

"I can't wait to introduce you to all the people I used to be friends with, before I started spending all my time with you."

"No, I don't want to live forever, but I damn sure don't want to be dead forever, either."

"You know you're getting old when..."

I said, your bones ache because you’re old. I’m referring you to an archaeologist.

"Honestly, John, I'm not angry! I was going to suggest you give up driving even before you hit my car in the parking lot!"

Heavy meals on wheels

Mr. Evers specifically asked for a plain coffee, not an espresso.

"You really need to think about getting glasses."

"Wish I could do that." "Better give him a dog treat and a bath first."

Rejuvenile Delinquents.

'Don't believe everything you read in the papers!' (Vicar to lady reading the war cry).

Remote Control Duck

'I'm fighting ageing.'

"Well, Mr. Goddam Fancy-Pants Small-Town-Expose hot shot! What makes you think we don't all have lusty, kiss-and-tell memoirs boiling away inside us?"

"I get it! I get it! Elephants never forget. Now quit bragging about it!"

"Just when I thought I had all the answers, I forgot what the questions were."

"I'm ready to go whenever you're through fussing with tablescapes."

"I cranked up the dose a tad. Why should kids have all the fun?"

"We missed Fashion Week!"

"Well, Dr. Garcia said he's doing all he can, but he can't make me any younger. But I don't care about getting younger. I just want to keep getting older."

'I can't make you younger...odometer tampering is against the law.'

Maybe you should leave the evolving to the younger fish.

"I'd like to get my withdrawal in either cryptocurrency or social-media exposure."

Snow & Flo series: Wedding guests.

Medication for the elderly

"At our age I'd say we have about two or three binge watches left in us."