Baby Humor Lover Pillows

"It's his emotional support animal."

"Gee, my first man cave!"

'No hair or teeth, can't walk or talk -- he's kind of a starter kit.'

"Have you met my bodyguard?"

"It's nice but I'm starting to think we should just wait for his real hair to grow in."

Baby's book is titled: 'Dummies for Dummies.'

Fat Kid 17- Swallows the phone

'I think it may be a limited edition.'

"I'm sure he wasn't that big when we went out

'Breasts can be so rude. So often they start without me.'

'No hair or teeth, can't walk or talk -- she's kind of a starter kit.'

Newborn making the V-sign

'I thought I might try a bit of Stand-up.'

We had to use my wife's pouch as a diaper bag.

Gangster Babies

'I guess I wasn't thinking. I bought a return ticket.'

A dingo brings home another baby - 'You take it back right now... we still got the last one you brought home!'

"No chance of accumulating frequent birthing points in here. This is the only trip I'll take."

CCTV? Good grief, what do they think I'm going to vandalise in here??

"You went here instead of the maternity ward. Fortunately, we experts in delivery too!"

"If mum's aerobic classes are to continue I'll need a passenger safety airbag fitted!"

Clearance sale. Everything must go!

"Look! the poor kid's prematurely BALD!"

'No hair or teeth, can't walk or talk -- he's kind of a starter kit.'

Fat Kid 18- Makes lego dentures

'So that's why babies don't have teeth.'

"One last question, where's its mute button?"

'Isn't he a little young for sideburns?'

'You think you need WHAT glands expressed?'

"Don't you dare ask me again...ARE WE THERE YET??"

"Who do you have to know around here to get a fluffy?"

"Baby FOMO."

Baby Going to Toilet on Father.

"'Waaaaah, waaaaah!' is not an answer!"

"It was dark, damp and cramped - why did you lock me in there for nine months??!..."