Ancient Archaeology Buff Gifts

"He's a hunter-gatherer-tinkerer-fixer-upper-restorer-reseller."

Tourists

"Hmm...well...It'll look better when it's finished...!"

"Aristophanes explains comedy"

"If we only used bigger clubs we would defeat our enemies every time, and we would dominate them forever!"

"I don’t know what your invention’s called, but it’s really irritating."

Stoneage puncture repair kit...

'According to creation mathematicians, all of Euclid's theories were originally found etched into rocks.'

"Have you been playing dice?"

"Make yourself comfortable on my new decorative throw rocks."

'A wheel? No wonder I broke a tooth. I thought it was a donut.'

Sphinx cat and mummy mouse

'The dreaded Anachronisaurus strikes again!'

"Well, that certainly killed my buzz."

Grim Reaper rowing a boat full of dead souls to the afterlife; a tip jar sits on the side of the boat.

"I think someone's trying to play games with us."

'I'm sure he was a great guy, but there's a new Pharaoh in town.'

"What does it mean? Heck, I don't know! It's mystifying!"

Those Were The Days

'You say the ARKS are NOT two by two?'

The Fall of Gnome

6,000 BC: Neolithic Barbecue

A watch face with Stonehenge

An ancient Egyptian exhibit at a museum.

A child at a museum starts to pull the wrappings off a mummy.

Stonehenge Explained

"A world without Ovid? I can't even begin to imagine a world without Ovid."

'I think it's more than a coincidence that I discover fire, and my wife discovers burnt food on the same day.'

"I think it was an election year."

"When I said make it RIGHT, I meant correctly."

"Here's the parking lot."

"No, this is NOT a beta-test!"

Herding lava back to the fire pit.

'Sometimes I wish we'd never told him he was adopted.'

Maybe the gods aren't angry. Maybe the gods are just yanking our chain.