Ancient History Aficionado Gifts

''Infrastructure'? - You mean like rocks and sticks?'

'Say, Rosetta, what's that stone you're working on?'

"That looks painful Achilles.Is it your curiously unnamed tendon again?"

'No, I said 'orse. Big wooden 'orse!'

Early detection was rarely helpful.

Alexander the Great

'Do you smell something burning?'

"You're not one of those Surrealists, are you?"

"It's called 'Pizza maker scratching his knee.'"

'Tough break.'

Mummies

'I wish they hadn't voted out instant replay.'

'Maybe we should have built the roads...."

'Aargh! -- if the Lord had meant for man to walk upright, He'd have given us chiropractors!'

Adam and Eve - Food scares

The Euro crisis in Greece.

"Well, what do you expect if they only use cheap labour?"

'Moses still in the bullrushes'

An Easter Island sculptor working on a statue.They both look like the statues.

'Language is a great invention, but what if we get hauled up on conspiracy charges?'

'No, you have it darling, really.'

'What the heck, this is a new one: They're cooking the mammoth!'

"Do you have to copy everything I do?"

"I don't think there's anyplace I'm in that much of a hurry to get to."

"So you think you're Cleopatra and have suicidal tendencies... I think there's an ASP for that."

Aeneas

""It says 'Do not bend, fold, or mutilate.'"

"If you think he's doing a bad job with this, you should see him trying to wrap a birthday present!!"

"Ahhh, there's nothing like that new cart smell."

"If we only used bigger clubs we would defeat our enemies every time, and we would dominate them forever!"

"This coin must be 2,000 years old. Try not to put this one in a pop machine."

"I believe you know Mars, God of Defense."

"Don't forget the screenplay."

"Have you been playing dice?"

"I don't know about this Icarus."