Workshop Dodger Gifts

"The 'No Excuses Sales Seminar' is this weekend...but I'm going to try to get out of it."

"You created a robot to do your homework for you? Apparently, laziness is the mother of invention."

"I haven't a clue what it does, but I don't know I managed without it"

"This is the communications workshop, right? Let’s get started, I’m prepared!"

"Mom, no raking for me this fall! Got any more leaf bags?"

'We built this city on Rock 'n' Roll, yeah baby. Is not an accurate assessment of our town's history.'

'When the doctor told you to warm up before exercising, I don't think he meant with hot chocolate and hot cross buns.'

"Your top 10 list of reasons why you didn't do your homework is creative, but not acceptable."

'He's kind of a rescue dog. He points to where the hardest work is, so that I can run into the opposite direction!'

Private Viewing

"I don't feel like going to school. Isn't that a flu-like symptom?"

Homework flavored dog food

"My dog ate my homework. Then the backup files were hacked by Russians."

"I like it here but if Santa doesn't get better WiFi I'm getting a new job."

"All right, what's it going to take to make this homework go away?"

"It's hard being a TV viewer trapped in the body of a student."

"As I understand it, he has a whole other workshop in Hong Kong where they make all that electronic stuff."

'If asked, we should all agree that this seminar never happened.'

"We interrupt this program to bring you a special message from your teachers..."

Tell me the truth. Do you think my signature is logo-esque?

Please Wait Here To Be Scolded

"Why run a marathon when you can sleep through it?"

"How was first grade? I don't know yet. I spent all day in the Principal's office."

'For sheer elegance you can't beat the black hole entropy formula.'

'I'm afraid turn out isn't as high as we'd expected...three of them misheard the date, five got the time wrong and everyone from marketing went to a hotel in Norwich by mistake.'

"Do I get to lawyer up before I see the Principal?"

Man trying to catch a saxophonist with butterfly wings.

"Personally, this child would love to be 'left behind.'"

'Three days, four different avoidance routines.'

'The homework ate my dog.'

"Forget about eating homework, I need you to carry my backpack!"

"Baldo, I appreciate your hard work...and your eagerness to complete your chores quickly. But next time...don't blow the leaves while I'm painting."

'9K a year!? It's an outrage! At my level of attendance that's 3K per lecture!'

'It's just a recliner with built-in heart rate monitor. But look at how many big inflatable balls are sold as exercise equipment.'

'I follow my doctor's orders religiously. He said for me to spend two hours a day on the tennis court.'