Yard Work Dodger Gifts

"Can't you rake the leaves? I'm raking in cash."

"Mom, no raking for me this fall! Got any more leaf bags?"

"He can't decide which one he likes best. . .His leaf blower, his weed wacker, or his metal detector."

"You created a robot to do your homework for you? Apparently, laziness is the mother of invention."

"Maybe we should cut back on those lawn catalogues."

"First time pruning?"

'I used to do that, but it just grows again.'

"You've just got to have the biggest and the best, have'nt you?!"

The Gardener's Calendar: Try to Repair It...

"He loves his leaf blower."

Neighbor Leaf Wars

Irritable trowel syndrome.

Man with raked leaves on wall plaques.

'He works out aggression by bayoneting the leaves.'

'What'll it cost me to got in shape for yardwork season?'

Lawnmower

Conservation Area

Okay, dig that one up!

"Mulch madness"

Beginning Yarder.

'We built this city on Rock 'n' Roll, yeah baby. Is not an accurate assessment of our town's history.'

'Told you to get your mower fixed.'

'Since he bought the leaf blower I hardly ever see him.'

"Must get a longer cable."

'When the doctor told you to warm up before exercising, I don't think he meant with hot chocolate and hot cross buns.'

"Your top 10 list of reasons why you didn't do your homework is creative, but not acceptable."

'He's kind of a rescue dog. He points to where the hardest work is, so that I can run into the opposite direction!'

'It says right here on the package, Ed, 'avoid any direct contact with skin'!'

Gardener's Calendar: Try to put the other things back...

A man raking his lawn watches as the leaves climb back into the trees.

'I imagine you'd like to hear about my progress...'

'George! This way quick!'

'I'd recommend the 9 tine.'

Homework flavored dog food

"Dad, can we please just buy a week wacker?"