Water Cooler Philosopher Gifts

17 Days Without a Reorganization

"So how are the cut-backs affecting your department?"

The Kind Of Synergy That Can Happen Only At The Office

'I find that coming in late and leaving early makes the day go by faster.'

'I'm not sure what I want out of life, but I want a lot of it.'

'It's been empty for two weeks and no one's noticed.'

Casual Tieday

Man at cooler, notices mouse hole also with cooler.

'Baxter! I should have known I'd find you by the water cooler!'

"He's still bitter that bottled water ruined his reign as king of the water cooler."

'Let me remind you, Waterman, you're only a distant relative.'

'You laugh, but you don't see people hanging around, do you?'

'Don't worry. At least you've got your back-up plan.'

We've run an exhaustive in-house background check. He's been vetted at the water cooler, fax machine and laser printer.

"I'm sick of Mr. Rod complaining about me behind my back...especially when he does it right to my face!"

"This is a tough place to work..."

"The corner ledge is reserved for senior management."

"The enemy of my enemy isn't my friend, but we do occasionally carpool together on the way into the office."

"Nobody hangs out at the water cooler anymore..."

"I love working for a great boss. At least I think I would."

"Must be the new philosophy teacher."

"I wasn't looking for love, but the water cooler really understands my needs."

'When I called her a witch, I had no idea...'

"So hardly working....or hardly working?"

'I have an MBA, but I've never MBAed.'

"Everyone, please welcome our new VP of being promoted and paid lots more than you for no apparent reason!"

Talk About Sports $2 a min.

"Most of us get around the company motto by saying 'No can do' instead!"

"We got the idea from studying Pavlov, if you mention bonuses they all stab each other in the back!"

I stay hydrated by slowly drinking eight glasses of water each day. I figure that's one hour less of work I have to do.

No Loitering. Beware of the Dog.

Friday is Wet Khakis Day!

Guess which "squeaky wheel" got another raise.

"Being my own boss sounds fun but I wouldn't be able to motivate myself."

Barrier around water cooler