Warfare Humorist Gifts

General's Coin Toss

Hague Convention Defied! The Tatcho Bomb.

'Can we have our ball back, please?'

"Sire, the barbarian's are no longer at the gate...they're inside it!"

Frank moonlights as a Grill Sergeant.

Cat in a tank...

"No, you dismantle your nuclear arsenal first."

'At ease, soldier.'

After defeating terror, George and his friends declare war on mild irritation and clouds.

Royal Bear Force - "Honey at 10 o'clock."

'Who said the Germans don't have a sense of humour? Just look at that card Hans Greber and we have haven't been shot at all day.'

"Did you call for a Medic?"

'Does my bum look big in this?'

'...and this is the Mess.'

French Army knife

"Let's see, this one is cherry flavored, I think this one is blueberry ..."

Tank driver wielding a slingshot.

'M.O.D. find budget replacement for the Fleet Air arm.'

'Me? Morale Officer? --Why do you always pick on ME?'

'At last! Some decent kit.'

At a Country House

Banting in the Yeomanry

'Well done troops: Spring is over, we can have a break now...'

'It's been five years since leaving Iraq and I'm still getting the sand out my ears.'

Your Country Needs MOO!

"Sir, the platoon suffered heavy casualties from a roadside IUD."

'THINGMY ON THE PORT BOW!! You know, what's it called? Long and pointy... Very fast... TORPEDO ON THE PORT BOW!!'

"Bad news Darling, I'm going to be posted abroad"

"Whoever made fun of my hat better step forward now, or I'll turn this march around!"

The Emperor of Irony

The Bengal Lancers/Bingo Lancers/Bagel Lancers/Bungle Lancers

Golf war: 'Fore!'

My army drill instructors license plate is HUP-2-3-4.

Beware of the dog.

'Thank you colonel we'll keep your strategy in mind.'