Military Life Humorist Gifts

Frank moonlights as a Grill Sergeant.

Cat in a tank...

"No, you dismantle your nuclear arsenal first."

'At ease, soldier.'

After defeating terror, George and his friends declare war on mild irritation and clouds.

A military officer sits at his desk with desk trays marked 'Search' and 'Destroy.'

Royal Bear Force - "Honey at 10 o'clock."

'Who said the Germans don't have a sense of humour? Just look at that card Hans Greber and we have haven't been shot at all day.'

'...and this is the Mess.'

French Army knife

'Does my bum look big in this?'

"Did you call for a Medic?"

Tank driver wielding a slingshot.

'M.O.D. find budget replacement for the Fleet Air arm.'

'At last! Some decent kit.'

'Me? Morale Officer? --Why do you always pick on ME?'

Ad Valorem

'Well done troops: Spring is over, we can have a break now...'

Banting in the Yeomanry

At a Country House

'It's been five years since leaving Iraq and I'm still getting the sand out my ears.'

Your Country Needs MOO!

"Sir, the platoon suffered heavy casualties from a roadside IUD."

General's Coin Toss

'THINGMY ON THE PORT BOW!! You know, what's it called? Long and pointy... Very fast... TORPEDO ON THE PORT BOW!!'

'It's only a slug Norman.'

Golf war: 'Fore!'

The Bengal Lancers/Bingo Lancers/Bagel Lancers/Bungle Lancers

Beware of the dog.

My army drill instructors license plate is HUP-2-3-4.

Peacekeeping?

'Thank you colonel we'll keep your strategy in mind.'