Vacuum Cleaner Aficionados Gifts

"Are any of these the perpetrator?"

Sounds that various toys make when they are vacuumed up.

'But you said to clean my room.'

"So kids, you got work from your teachers right?"

Niche Extracurriculars

I think these suits have feet in them so we won't leave prints

'I know how you like things to be clean, so I gave fishy a bath!"

'Oh my god, it's the Grim Housekeeper!'

'And this, of course, is the clean room.'

A better way to sweep the floor.... just shuffle!

Sailors Scrubbing the Decks

New Sheik'n'vac magic carpet freshners.

"See. I told you they have Roomba Rodeos when we're gone."

Witches flying on broomsticks. One of them is flying on a vacuum cleaner.

"Ok, you wash, you dry...."

Rubbing alcoholics anonymous.

I have a date tonight. She's coming over. I need to get home and clean it all up. Not so fast, little buddy. Cleaning is a delicate art. Clean too little, and she thinks you're a slob. Clean too much, and she thinks you're hiding something. It's almost as if you haven't read chapter 7 of the manual. What manual? "Mancleaning: By Randy 'The Rock' Taylor." You wrote a whole book about cleaning? It's the follow-up to "How to Reach the Tenth Level of Passion by Feng Shui-ing Your Dust Bunnies." It's

COVID-19 dime

"It's a loaner until mine is back from the shop."

I can't believe the kids will be home tomorrow. Wow. That was one short week. It was romantic to be alone � And do what we can't when the kids are around! Mmm. It did feel good! � To finally clean the basement. My dream comes true.

What a nice thing to say! Thanks for calling. What's up? Jan said Twig was a terrific babysitter. No surprise. Click. But then she said something odd. About MY daughter? When she got home, their house was spotless. Maybe it was a different "Twig."

'Dust-mop-baby-jumper.'

"Yeah, I used to look forward to Spring too sis, but now, Mum says I'm old enough to help with Spring cleaning..."

Vacuum Cleaner Plugged Into Pig's Nose.

I'm the gorilla's nuts... I'm the dog's bo****ks... He's never been good at hiding his light under a bushel.

I told you to lift your @#$% feet.

"The grossest thing you can imagine is being shoved feet first into an 'icky' spiderweb...are you kidding me?"

'I think it's time to clean out the refrigerator.'

Content Cat vs Cat Content

The cold vacuum of space...

'For the love of God, does anybody have a stain stick?'

"So there really is a vacuum in outer space!"

If there were a New York Vacuums baseball team...

'Stupid maid and her stupid upgrades!'

'You suck!'