Traveler On Alert Gifts

Airport Security Scanner Sees More Than You Think

"Do we have to go to the beach? I think the airline mixed up my luggage."

'My wife is going to kill me. All her shopping coupons are in that lost luggage.'

Airplane Mode.

Injured backpacker.

"You said getting to the air B&B would be quick, I didn't think you meant this quick!"

Wherever You Go, There You Are - Next Exit.

"They said whatever you left in Las Vegas, stays in Las Vegas."

'I'm sorry, did you say you wanted to try fresh sugarcane.'

"A large donation usually calms him down."

"I always like to have plenty of 'walking around' nuts."

'So we lost your luggage -- You still have your health, don't you?'

'I don't like to question your map reading dear, but could you have another look at the last left turn?'

Left and Right: Please be consistent.

"I have this nagging feeling we've forgotten something..."

"I learned how to pack small. I bought Brad a big suitcase."

'Those new airport scanners can see through clothes!'

"Frankly, I've about had it with air travel."

"I just remembered... I forgot to turn off the sink."

Uh oh. What if someone on the flight wears their unlucky underwear?!

'I went with a tour group to Europe, and they dumped me in Spain.'

'Would you mind holding my hand Jim? The truth is, I'm deathly afraid of flying.'

At Travel Agent - "We're interested in a no-diarrhea itinery."

Product Recall (aeroplane)

'It says, 'Get back on the tour bus'.'

"My flight’s been delayed for the third time—whom do I punch in the face for that?"

Man is mugged in the snow and then mugged again by the same person when on holiday.

Never choose a vacation spot by its posters.

Oh, hey, want me to take that?

Showing a little leg wasn't getting him anywhere.

Scared as Hell Airlines.

'Another one of your screw-ups! You were supposed to get us a rental car!'

'The good news is the airline was trying to skimp on fuel, and no terrorists were involved.'t

'About this trip to the Amazon jungle...I want my money back!'

Excess Baggage: The conception of electronic ticketing still has a few airline passengers spooked.