Survival Humor Fans Gifts

Crash survivor with sunglasses.

'I'd like two pizzas, one with cheese and pepperoni and the other with cheese and sausage. One more thing, do you deliver?'

Admit it. We have a drinking problem.

'No, I didn't know it was hunting season - why do you ask?'

'If we hadn't outsourced the staff, we could've eaten them.'

"That's 'Help' with an 'H'."

"What, no day spa? And you call this a luxury bunker."

'Bottled water or other non-carbonated diet beverage!'

'You are here' sign on desert island.

"If you got us lost ... I am so eating you first."

'I'm kind of a survivalist myself. I roast my own coffee and distil my own gin.'

"I'm next time I spring for the personal Wi-Fi hotspot..."

"Sure he's cute, but we should have discussed this."

"This better be high tide."

"At least my putting has improved."

"When you're voted out of "Survivor", I thought they just sent you home!"

'It's day to day, but so far I've survived,'

'I'm sorry I don't date people from other islands!'

'Are you going anywhere near a chemist?'

"You are so lucky I keep kosher."

'Hey, I know! -- We can dig a basement and wait till it floods!'

Republican Beach. . . Nature Preserve rule: EAT OR BE EATEN!

'You go ahead. I just don't feel like drinking this afternoon ...'

'Oh wait, I've got a good one! I spy with my little eye.'

"The problem is, you never know if they're ripe until you bite into one."

"I'm increasing your OnlyFan subscription..."

'I bet it's nice and warm inside!'

Stay in school.

"Karl, act like a stuffed porcupine!"

"Will you quit listening to your ten all-time favorite albums and help me find some food!"

Woman on desert island reads message she finds in a bottle: 'It's an ad for a diet club.'

"Miss Reed, could you please bring me a palm tree and some ragged clothes?"

Look! A penny!

Koool sunglasses, only $10-.