Story Snob Gifts

Fiction book sales.

'Great Books' 'Good Books' 'Trash'

"Now I really hate poetry."

Restaurant Francais: All you can pronounce £30.

Not to be a motion picture. Will remain just a book.

Sign in book shop window: 'Critics agree the book is much better than the movie.'

"Tracey, this is Gene. He also read the Nancy Reagan book in unbound galleys."

'This wine is dreadful - try some.'

"Everybody comfortable? Got what they want? Know their place?"

'Yeah, my home theater even has spilled drinks and popcorn on the floor.'

"The audience is really classy tonight, they are throwing quail eggs."

"'City Slickers' was O.K., but, let's face it, it was no 'Claire's Knee.'"

'I may not know much about art. But, I don't know what I like either.'

"I believe this is one of Rembrandt's earliest selfies."

"I wouldn't read that book, dear... it's only there to impress visitors."

The book is so much better than the film..

'The opinions expressed by Burt are not necessarily those of Ernie.'

'Oh man, every time.'

"I don't wanna 'adult' today."

"I used to write page-turners, but my MFA cured me of that."

"YouTube's one thing, but cats will never make it on the big screen."

" will enver read that book, and I"m eagerly waiting to avoid the movie."

"I've seen this film ten times and it's still awful."

"I can't decide if that was bad in a good way, good in a good way, good in a bad way, or bad in a bad way."

'Listen my man, I am not being condescending, I am just trying to use words I think you may be able to understand. . .'

"Hey, that's your personal pan pizza. NO SHARING!"

'The acting was awful and the plot was thin, but the mortgage rate looked interesting.'

'The review said drinking this wine is like drinking a Rembrandt. All I taste is the frame.'

"Do you have a seat in business with a view of economy?"

"I keep asking you for ideas, Hibblemeyer, and you keep drawing blanks."

"Hi! I haven't had a crap in months. Bon appetit!"

"I'm enrolled in a total immersion wine class."