Literary Snob Gifts

"Oh, just hanging out, reading Upanishads."

'I found it difficult to put down, but I will. It's trite rubbish.'

"Tracey, this is Gene. He also read the Nancy Reagan book in unbound galleys."

"Every few years, a book comes along that’s so ahead of its time, so hauntingly beautiful, I’ll buy it and put it on my bookshelf."

"Now I really hate poetry."

Listen, just because he's moving from "fiction" to "literature" doesn't mean he's better than us.

Axel, I notice you read a lot of highbrow books

" will enver read that book, and I"m eagerly waiting to avoid the movie."

The book is so much better than the film..

"I used to write page-turners, but my MFA cured me of that."

"I wouldn't read that book, dear... it's only there to impress visitors."

"I will never read that book, and I'm eagerly waiting to avoid the movie."

"Meet The Author"

Accelerated reading. Slowpoke reading,

The Dorrie Decimal System

Blue Stockings

'He likes to power nap.'

"My novel is not a doorstop!"

German Expressionist Breakfast

Not to be a motion picture. Will remain just a book.

The Grasshopper's Feast: A Prophetic Vision

The writer: something who devotes a lifetime of solitude to the same of communication.

John Bunyan

"Hey, it's not all fire and brimstone anymore—one of our nine circles is even smoke-free."

Don Quixote

'Yorick? No, I don't think so, unless of course he was a Neanderthal!'

Sue the Author 3PM

"Oh, this old thing?"

"The low-res JPEG of Dorian Gray"

"Not that I have the time, but I enjoy reading."

Trilby - 'Je prong!'

'There's no art to the mind's construction on Facebook, Macbeth.'

'You have to Marvell eh - 'annihalating all that's made to a green thought in a green shade.''

"I don't care if it is itty-bitty. Turn it off!"

When Shakespeare gets up early, on the wrong side of the bed of a stranger, and in a clown suit... Later that same day, he will commence work on 'The Comedy of Errors.'"