Literary Snob T-Shirts

"Oh, just hanging out, reading Upanishads."

'I found it difficult to put down, but I will. It's trite rubbish.'

"Tracey, this is Gene. He also read the Nancy Reagan book in unbound galleys."

"Every few years, a book comes along that’s so ahead of its time, so hauntingly beautiful, I’ll buy it and put it on my bookshelf."

"Now I really hate poetry."

" will enver read that book, and I"m eagerly waiting to avoid the movie."

The book is so much better than the film..

"I used to write page-turners, but my MFA cured me of that."

"I wouldn't read that book, dear... it's only there to impress visitors."

"I will never read that book, and I'm eagerly waiting to avoid the movie."

"Meet The Author"

Accelerated reading. Slowpoke reading,

The Dorrie Decimal System

'He likes to power nap.'

Blue Stockings

"My novel is not a doorstop!"

German Expressionist Breakfast

Not to be a motion picture. Will remain just a book.

The writer: something who devotes a lifetime of solitude to the same of communication.

John Bunyan

The Grasshopper's Feast: A Prophetic Vision

"Hey, it's not all fire and brimstone anymore—one of our nine circles is even smoke-free."

'Yorick? No, I don't think so, unless of course he was a Neanderthal!'

Don Quixote

Trilby - 'Je prong!'

"The low-res JPEG of Dorian Gray"

'You have to Marvell eh - 'annihalating all that's made to a green thought in a green shade.''

"I don't care if it is itty-bitty. Turn it off!"

Sue the Author 3PM

"Oh, this old thing?"

"Not that I have the time, but I enjoy reading."

When Shakespeare gets up early, on the wrong side of the bed of a stranger, and in a clown suit... Later that same day, he will commence work on 'The Comedy of Errors.'"

A Footnote - Self Portrait of Beardsley, Bound to the God of Nature

BOOKSHOP, 'We're pushing our do-it-yourself kit today, sir -- a ream of paper and a dozen pencils.'

"The moral of the story, honey, is that being a celebrity does not make you a credible children’s book author."