Spider Slyboots Gifts

Dinner at the Trapdoors

A spider is afraid of another spider's mask.

Yeah, it's funny, but you'll see, in this house, it's the guy who screams the loudest...

Extreme Bungy

"Wait—what did I come into this room to do?"

"You can’t just go up the waterspout whenever you hear something you don’t like!"

A violin spider and a saxaphone spider

Child makes a toy and frightens himself.

"Sorry, Pal. Sometimes nature's not very pretty."

Idle parts

'Sure, but will you still love me when I bite off your head and eat it?'

'I want you to bring me one.'

Spider Web Stocking

OMG UR HOT

"Why settle for itsy-bitsy when you could be swole as hell?"

"That Feng Shui class I took is paying off!"

'Looks like the soup comes with flies.'

'Well it's too bad you're not a black widow like me, Slyvia...'

"Are those my slippers?!"

Spider's Web Trampoline

'Are we there yet?'

Unwelcome guests can be caught and thrown out...there is no need to kill them.

'Did spiders invent bungee jumping, Dad?'

"Ooh don't stop Bob, the last time you ran your fingers through my hair like this was on our wedding night!"

"Of all my husbands I believe the first one tasted the best."

"Now, cover your second, fourth and seventh eyes and read the next line."

'Bernice . . . could you come in here please? Bring a can of hairspray and a cigarette lighter!'

'I warned Harry that he'd have a bad hair day if he got near that leaf blower.'

Child's slipper getting caught in a mousetrap.

'Reallly Miss Jones...all this fuss over a silly little spider!'

'I want to know where this relationship is going.'

'Rats, we've caught a dung beetle: They taste horrible...'