Spiders Gifts

"I tell you, he's up to no good. He spends hours on the dark web."

'Sure, but will you still love me when I bite off your head and eat it?'

'Did spiders invent bungee jumping, Dad?'

'I don't know, Charlie -- marriage is a big step!'

Spider harpist.

'This is another fine mess, Stanley.'

'She'll have you for breakfast, mate.'

Customs caution: rabid tarantulas with AIDS inside

'You've been drinking again.'

"To be honest - I got this web design from a template."

'Reallly Miss Jones...all this fuss over a silly little spider!'

"You want flies with that?"

Grimey The Myopic Spider.

"Really Miss Jones...all this fuss over a silly little spider!"

Ned was having the most fabulous dream! He was wrapped up, snug as a bug in a rug, that is until...

"Well, the spider you swallowed in the scrumpy is now wriggling and tickling in cider."

Human in a Glass

Insect Insults.

Those are some hiccups, Bob.

"There will be an enormous fly in your future!"

What did I tell you about covering your bottom when you sneeze?

Spider Bungy

Leather Daddy Long Legs

"Now, if I could just conquer my fear of spiders..."

Want the wings as an appetizer?

Spider Exhibit. It says spiders can have hundreds of children at the same time. No wonder they climb the walls! (Published originally on July 23, 2002.)

That's the music room.

Maybe I should switch to decaf.

"I can see getting stuck in your own web, but how'd you manage to wrap yourself up, too?!"

OMG UR HOT

"Woooooo... big strong man afraid of a little spider?"

"Wow. You all are so attentive today...what's up?"

"The scariest part is knowing that someday something'll come along that will make us go, 'Even the spider mutants weren't this bad.' "

"Of all my husbands I believe the first one tasted the best."

"EEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEK! Oh, it's only you."