Secret Message Decoder Gifts

Barks in code.

"Are you sure there wasn't a floor model?"

"I believe it was called 'cursive'."

'I heard it through the grapevine.'

'Decoding is often 1, 14, 20, 9, 3, 12, 9, 13, 1, 3, 20, 9, 3.'

'I'll be right with you after I've checked my messages, dear...'

"Let me guess: Step two, add sand."

"Leave the lights burning when you go home. Pass it on."

'...we were able to hide some rather significant losses.'

'It's this one here, that I don't understand.'

"I'm not sure she really liked our gift. She used just two exclamation points after 'Thanks'."

"You got my text... but did you get my subtext?"

"Hey, got your message. Just wanted to let you know you spelled 'desperately' wrong."

"This is my voice mail."

Never choose a vacation spot by its posters.

Russian Missiles Incognito

"I believe it translates to... have a nice day."

'I've never seen this symbol before. What could it mean?'

Marooned Optometrist

Text/Subtext Message

"This way, the humans get the message."

"I would be bilingual if you were bilingual!"

'It's from the bloke on the other island. It reads; Help. I'm stranded on a desert island.'

Man reads subliminal message during eye test.

"If we could decipher their language we'd have a clue to their intelligence levels."

Dept of statistics: 'vital...nonessential'.

'Connect insert A, B, and C into slots D, E, and F. Tighten using assembly tool G. What in the H are they talking about?'

Dog Typos.

"More misinformation."

Signage

'His paintings always have a message.'

'This is our conference room modeled after the United Nations so we can understand what our tech support people are saying.'

But this doesn't really define me

'Beetles...I heard if you listen to their songs backwards, there are cryptic messages.'