Seasonal Satire Appreciator Pillows

The Frankenstein snowman.

The Berlin Peace Movement

"It's Dr. Sadie. Go ahead, caller." "Yeah, how come you haven't said 'Merry Christmas' yet?" "Oh, that’s because I was hoping to provoke everyone who’s upset about the so-called 'war on Christmas' to spend all their time on hold waiting to castigate me. That way, all the normal people who don’t think Christmas is just another chance to play the victim can open their gifts in peace." "You're welcome, America." "Why haven't you played 'Jingle Bells' yet?"

Futile Little Snow Shoveler Guy Snow Globe

'Summer's over and it's time to fall in!'

"You can't be serious about all these travel expenses in December!"

"Right so that's agreed, we can say 'Happy Festive Season' as long as we add the caveat that we are in no way liable for any lack of 'happiness' or a surfeit of 'misery'!"

Missing Daylight: So dark. So cold.

Santa with a boy on his knee:' I've got your 300 dollars. Did you bring your Mom and Dad's social security numbers and password information?'

"We've decided to cut back and have Christmas every other year."

"Did you get some work done?"

"Wake up, it's Spring and we forgot to vote!"

"You're really serious about that diet!"

Snowman arriving home to his Refrigerator Home

"Merry Christmas. You Cheerful, Chirpring, Cheeping, Tweeting, Tw*ttering, Twittering Tw*t!"

"Defending you isn't going to be easy. . . Sana actually started an 'Extremely cruel, stupid and psychotic kid' list especially for you."

The Three Wise Women

Santa's grotto advertising 'Talk to Santa', is next to a diet clinic with a sign in the window, 'Santa, talk to us.'

"Has your husband been exposed to Christmas at all?"

'Year after year I play Santa, and I still don't know how to give.'

Christmas 2020

'I'm the ghost of non-sectarian midwinter public holiday future.'

"I give you about ten days, then your head will rot."

Santa narrowly avoids discrimination suit

'Someone call 9-1-1!!!'

Gardening Terminology: Freezia

"Wow! She's hot."

"You're not distancing."

Snirtman

"This doesn't feel right..."

"I'm determined to beat the traffic, I just need to work out how they fly."

Bus of Fools

Wintertime Barometer.