Seasonal Satire Collector Pillows

The Three Wise Women

"Hell, George - they even miss ME!"

"It's Dr. Sadie. Go ahead, caller." "Yeah, how come you haven't said 'Merry Christmas' yet?" "Oh, that’s because I was hoping to provoke everyone who’s upset about the so-called 'war on Christmas' to spend all their time on hold waiting to castigate me. That way, all the normal people who don’t think Christmas is just another chance to play the victim can open their gifts in peace." "You're welcome, America." "Why haven't you played 'Jingle Bells' yet?"

Futile Little Snow Shoveler Guy Snow Globe

The Frankenstein snowman.

"It would appear they worshipped the almighty dollar."

The water desk

"My God—I've forgotten the number of my Swiss bank account!"

'Someday, son, 50 of this will belong to your ex-wife,'

Slave Drivers.

'Don't be so sexist, sweet cheeks.'

Missing Daylight: So dark. So cold.

'Thanks for not asking for a rise.'

My boss is a real turd.

"You are the weakest wink...goodbye."

Snowman and stickmen losing arms

"It is as I feared, Mr. Moran. It's definitely a stiff upper lip."

"Right so that's agreed, we can say 'Happy Festive Season' as long as we add the caveat that we are in no way liable for any lack of 'happiness' or a surfeit of 'misery'!"

'Finally, an objective way to decide who to promote around here.'

Introducing Peter's Cousin - Murray Pan - The Boy Who Refused To Stay A Child

"Sorry Ma'am, but lamb delivery is only available in Spring..."

"Of course I got rid of him...in my own way."

"We've decided to cut back and have Christmas every other year."

"Did you get some work done?"

Night of the Living Reindeer

"Wake up, it's Spring and we forgot to vote!"

"See that guy over there? Used to be a real headliner."

"Fire, bad. Smoke, good... quite the conundrum."

"Fruitcake?""I'm stuffed."

'Those are to increase my mental energy. . . Those are a mild sedative to calm my nerves.'

"You're really serious about that diet!"

"Of course there are some advantages to working here...we have a Food Bank situated conveniently at the end of the street!"

'I hope everyone saw the ATM installed in the entrance.'

'Well, your income looks good, and you've been on your job for over two years... but it seems you're 15 trillion dollars in debt.'

'I'm concerned. I enjoy paying taxes.'