Seasonal Satire Seeker Pillows

Rival Santa Clauses: 'You may have little, more helpful elves, but my Rudolph as a VERY shiny nose.'

"Has your husband been exposed to Christmas at all?"

"It's Dr. Sadie. Go ahead, caller." "Yeah, how come you haven't said 'Merry Christmas' yet?" "Oh, that’s because I was hoping to provoke everyone who’s upset about the so-called 'war on Christmas' to spend all their time on hold waiting to castigate me. That way, all the normal people who don’t think Christmas is just another chance to play the victim can open their gifts in peace." "You're welcome, America." "Why haven't you played 'Jingle Bells' yet?"

Futile Little Snow Shoveler Guy Snow Globe

The Frankenstein snowman.

"The subaqueous qualities of the biomorphic forms spacially undermine the larger metaphorical resonance of the mark-making."

"Right so that's agreed, we can say 'Happy Festive Season' as long as we add the caveat that we are in no way liable for any lack of 'happiness' or a surfeit of 'misery'!"

Missing Daylight: So dark. So cold.

"You're really serious about that diet!"

"We've decided to cut back and have Christmas every other year."

"Did you get some work done?"

"Wake up, it's Spring and we forgot to vote!"

'Year after year I play Santa, and I still don't know how to give.'

Santa's grotto advertising 'Talk to Santa', is next to a diet clinic with a sign in the window, 'Santa, talk to us.'

Snowman arriving home to his Refrigerator Home

"Defending you isn't going to be easy. . . Sana actually started an 'Extremely cruel, stupid and psychotic kid' list especially for you."

The Three Wise Women

Christmas 2020

'I'm the ghost of non-sectarian midwinter public holiday future.'

"I give you about ten days, then your head will rot."

Santa narrowly avoids discrimination suit

Suburban blues legends

"You're not distancing."

"Oi! You little fucker!"

Woodpecker sitting on snowmans nose

"This doesn't feel right..."

Dead & Breakfast.

Wintertime Barometer.

"I'm determined to beat the traffic, I just need to work out how they fly."

Gardening Terminology: Freezia

Snirtman

Snowman: 'Maybe we should put down a towel first..?'

"Wow! She's hot."