Seasonal Satire Fans Pillows

'Some country that doesn't have Thanksgiving!'

Boxing Day

Santa's grotto advertising 'Talk to Santa', is next to a diet clinic with a sign in the window, 'Santa, talk to us.'

"Little help?"

"It's Dr. Sadie. Go ahead, caller." "Yeah, how come you haven't said 'Merry Christmas' yet?" "Oh, that’s because I was hoping to provoke everyone who’s upset about the so-called 'war on Christmas' to spend all their time on hold waiting to castigate me. That way, all the normal people who don’t think Christmas is just another chance to play the victim can open their gifts in peace." "You're welcome, America." "Why haven't you played 'Jingle Bells' yet?"

The Frankenstein snowman.

Futile Little Snow Shoveler Guy Snow Globe

"Right so that's agreed, we can say 'Happy Festive Season' as long as we add the caveat that we are in no way liable for any lack of 'happiness' or a surfeit of 'misery'!"

Missing Daylight: So dark. So cold.

'He wants to return some shade trees because they stopped working in November.'

'In future a reg number will suffice, ok.'

"Wake up, it's Spring and we forgot to vote!"

"Did you get some work done?"

"We've decided to cut back and have Christmas every other year."

"I know I say it in every episode, Carson, but the world is changing and we have to change with it."

"You're really serious about that diet!"

"Look at you, all gnarly and naked and gross!"

The Three Wise Women

"Defending you isn't going to be easy. . . Sana actually started an 'Extremely cruel, stupid and psychotic kid' list especially for you."

Snowman arriving home to his Refrigerator Home

The Itchy Back

"Has your husband been exposed to Christmas at all?"

'Year after year I play Santa, and I still don't know how to give.'

"Owww!! Yes, that hurts!"

'Bless you.'

Christmas 2020

'I'm the ghost of non-sectarian midwinter public holiday future.'

How to Tell Spring is Here.

"I give you about ten days, then your head will rot."

The City of Eden…in Fact - Martin Outside the 'Office' of Chuzzlewit & Co

Gesundheit! - a christmas tree should be fresh.

Wintertime Barometer.

'C'mon the one with the frilly knickers!'

"Wow! She's hot."