Seafaring Humor Enthusiast Gifts

Periscope sighting

Shipwreck captain playing with toy boat.

The British Territory of the South Sandwich Islands.

Crew Goofs Off While Out Of Sight

"Actually, I used them as collateral for a loan."

'How long have you operated multi-engines, sailor?'

"Ticket and passport, please."

Recalculating

"And so if the pillage numbers don't improve this quarter, I have just one word for you: waterskis."

Tugboat tugging Iceberg

Late Night with Patrick O'Brian

'It followed me home, can I keep it?'

'I told you we should have unionized.'

"Let’s draw him closer to New Bedford — we’ll get cell service there and Instagram the heck out of this!"

Fisherman selling sardines in oil, haddock in oil, cod in oil etc..

'What do you mean the men are unhappy! What on earth gives you that idea?'

'I think we should wake the Captain!'

"It was an accident! How many times must I apologize?"

"Oh. . . What shall we do with a sunken trailer?"

"Isn't it obvious how he got the job? He 'suctioned' up."

"Damn it, doesn't anybody on this ship have depth perception?"

"She's sinking alright, Captain. Even the rats are wearing life jackets!"

Angry pirate looking at angry parrot (wearing diaper) on his shoulder.

Sailor's pipe is a ship's funnel.

Captain Eddie's New Boat: 'First of all, Eddie, most people don't usually lose theah boats...'

The guardrail brings it up to code.

'Oh no! Not 'Barnacle Bill the Sailor', again.'

The skipper never wears a hat that fits. He's always been afraid of cap-sizing!

"There's nothing wrong with the ship. We just got a better offer."

I know, right? You eat five million plankton, and the last one is ALSWAYS as bad one.

'I wonder if it was such a good idea to outsource all the staff?'

"After the life he's had, he just said 'What the hell'..."

'Help.'

School Crossing

' You'll have to come see my weekend place in Cornwall.'