Rural Life Supporter Gifts

'It's okay, Larry, I've got this one.'

Cow jumping over the moonshine.

Please Drove Carefully.

It’s God’s country, if your God wears camouflage and dips tobacco.

Lamb Noise.

Goat about goat: 'He's no longer gruff since he's been on Prozac.'

"They’re real."

'I'm collecting manure for my strawberries.' The woman says, 'I always put cream and sugar on mine.'

"You say that using a colicky horse to pull you out of the mud may actually help his colic?"

'Leadership training.'

"Your shepherd, Louie, has retired. I'm Mr. Smathers. I will be your grazing-resource coördinator and flock welfare-and-security manager."

'...doomed...from here...to eter...nity...'

LAST-MINUTE CAMPAIGN STOP

'Oh, I plow the fields, Greta takes care of the house, and young Johan, here, maintains the website.'

Modern Calamities. Farmer in the Dell. Do something Maw

'Cows have bells because their horns don't work.'

'Jimmie, run and tell your dad the tractor is flooded.'

"Welcome to Randolph, Vermont. Don't even think of relocating here!"

Mummy?!

'I'm not feeling well. I think I've got human flu.'

'There'll be a special meeting of the board concerning the recent generous contribution of stock.'

A cow on a drip.

"I like friut flies!"

The physics of the situation had Jed confused. The cow had merely ambled onto the haystack, so was clearly not a leapt-on Yet at the same time, it clearly was a moo-on.

"Have you ever actually seen a chicken cross the road?"

'Oh Yeah! It's frosty! BOO-YAH!'

'Toilet paper, Lassie! Fetch toilet paper! Stupid mutt!'

"I can't afford to feed you."

"Let me guess...you forgot to put their hand-brakes on!"

'My practice is limited to small animals, Sir....'

Welcome to a Sleepy Little Town - name available on request.

'Why should I be scared? I'm not a crow...'

"Daisy, Daisy, I've seen the farmer filling in the forms: We're going to the Agricultural Show!"

Stunt Fly flying through a cow.

Maternity ward on the farm.