Retirement Humor Lover Gifts

'As a practioner of complimentary medicine, I must say you are marvellous for your age.'

"I'm sitting here going over all my troubles in my mind..."

"Since he retired I like to keep him handy around the house."

"Why bother?"

WW2 fighter pilot with emoji kills

"You're crappin' in the closet again, Claude."

"But, doctor, what are the advantages of living longer?"

'I don't think I've ever heard of the Geezer Scouts or Geezer Scout cookies.'

"I see Joe Bosco passed away." "Yeah. I heard he laid down the boogie and played that funky music til he died."

"Scientists have extended the life of the fruit fly."

"The Doctor says it's very rate for the superannuated to get taller."

A child with a parasol is blown off the Chain Pier in Brighton

"You're getting more wrinklier, grandpa. You should drink more water."

'Ain't it great, Wally, to be over the hill and not under it!'

Old man has a walking stick case.

'Did someone say something?'

"You remind me of myself - you know - a while ago."

"Hurry up with that cork!"

I'm retired...I was tired yesterday and I'm tired again today.

Pensioners - Old ink Pens at the park sitting and walking

"Honey, your radon testing kit is here."

"When you talked me into eternal life, you left out the part about menopause."

"My bottom went to sleep."

"Help! I've fallen and my son is a disappointment!"

"No plans set in stone yet, but I'll probably spend some time getting on my wife's last nerve, maybe hyperfocus on the lawn."

"You look amazing Dad. Has Mrs Arnold been ironing your face again?"

'Aha, the vitamins for seniors swaps additives for preservatives.'

'It was a Christmas present from last year. They're cute when they're puppies.'

"It's the Florida kid."

'One hundred is the new ninety!'

'The teachers' range are all designed vertically so they can stand at the front of the class.'

"Harry seldom leaves his retirement cubicle."

"I see Arthur's arthritus is acting up again."

"Happy birthday. They were out of bourbon so I got you those underpants you can pee in."

Santa replaces reindeer with a mobility scooter.