Retirement Humor Buff Gifts

Old Yolk's Home.

"Stepping on the gown never works. They run faster without it."

Cat Nip.

Self Service Restaurant: 'Where do you keep the eggs?'

'The meek shall inherit the Earth!'

The Seven Dwarfs After Therapy

'He does lack social skills.'

The Golfing Accident

Fishing line going in to water and then dropping down from sky at top of panel.

"And would you like flies with that?"

"Halloween is the perfect time to land on Earth. Nobody will notice us and we can get free candy."

'Try and be pleasant dear, you don't want to alienate it.'

"I've told you kids - that's not a toy!"

Stepping on clown's shoe...

"Oh, yeah? Well, you smell nice!"

"The new OS update should fix the bug that makes you want to murder everyone."

'My new cellphone has a 'self-help' program...'

'We're well positioned, but we lack leadership.'

'Okay, I see it now...lame in the third hind leg on the left side!'

Bottle-nosed Dolphins.

'The worst thing about it is I'm claustrophobic.'

"While you were out, the staff whittled away your desk into a totem pole."

'The next case Your Honor, is a palimony suit. The ant vs the grasshopper.'

'Ah, business as usual.'

"Beware of God"

"Okay guys you have your assignments. Let's get cracking!"

"You inviting me to lunch? I don't know - after all - I barely know you!"

'We had to discontinue the alphabet soup, sir - Too many censorship problems.'

Vampire collects bottles of blood from his doorstep.