Retirement Home Humor Aficionado Gifts

"My bottom went to sleep."

"Why bother?"

'...and remember, son, never throw up on an old carpet...wait until they get a new one!'

"Scientists have extended the life of the fruit fly."

"That's not what I meant when I suggested rocking on the porch, Mr. Clampwell."

"Good grief, Bradbury! How long have you been working at home?"

'Ain't it great, Wally, to be over the hill and not under it!'

'When you get older everything hurts... and what doesn't hurt doesn't work!'

Pensioners - Old ink Pens at the park sitting and walking

Affordable housing

'You are always living in the past!'

Who left their dishes in the sink? Life at the Petri Household.

"No plans set in stone yet, but I'll probably spend some time getting on my wife's last nerve, maybe hyperfocus on the lawn."

"It's the Florida kid."

'One hundred is the new ninety!'

'Hot dang! Ethel, check out Raymond's new twenty-twos!'

Santa replaces reindeer with a mobility scooter.

"Happy birthday. They were out of bourbon so I got you those underpants you can pee in."

Old fly...retirement home.

An old Dracula's false teeth fall out.

"Kick me"

'The Retirement Village Blacksmith.'

'When did I become so old and morose?' 'I know. It seems only yesterday you were young and morose.'

"This says you're only 54. We need to cart you down to the rec center for questioning."

"Who gets Meals on Wheels?"

"Enjoy your retirement. I'm sure you will survive all of us. Hahaha, just kidding!"

'The Ladies Home Auxiliary claims responsibility.'

Oap recruitment.

Pensioner being chased up stair lift by pensioners.

"I said, my testicles are cold." "That's because they're in the dog's water bowl again."

"I'm sitting here going over all my troubles in my mind..."

'Su casa is now mi casa.'

No Hoodies

"Either the house was built on a flood plain..."

Old Yolk's Home.