Religious Story Lovers Gifts

"Two for Bethlehem, I assume you want a Virgin flight."

"Maybe the next one will be a singles cruise."

"Hang on, isn't this the second pair of zebras we've had today?"

"I've told you before one at each end!"

"Maybe you should go make sure we're in the right line."

'You say the ARKS are NOT two by two?'

"We have plenty of time to catch the ark."

"And maybe throw in a talking snake to make sure they don't take it literally."

"If this Goliath bloke is as big as they say, I can just hang around the forest until he's gone."

"Two of every known creature on the planet and you forgot the pooper-scooper?"

'Why did Moses wander in the desert for forty years?'

'Don't believe everything you read in the papers!' (Vicar to lady reading the war cry).

'You always talk about robbing Peter to pay Paul, but you never mention Mary.'

'Not only will you know everything but I'll see that you get your own talk show.'

Summer in Elysium and The long vacation in Arcadia

Regifts of the Magi

So … how did you two meet?

''Tree of Knowledge,' eh? - Has it been fact-checked?'

'Noah, before you leave we'd like to have a word with you!'

'Wait a minute... What the heck is frankincense?'

Uses of a Dead Cat in History: 'I ran out of pebbles.'

"We don't see ourselves as either a David or a Goliath. We're content to just be the company that manufactures the sling shots."

'We were hoping You'd just say 'Be fruitful and multiply' again.'

Uses of a Dead Cat in History: Jesus has a Practice Before Raising Lazarus.

Pastoring for Dummies

'Talking about Jesus is NOT name-dropping!'

"It's a land flowing with milk and honey, with a small but lively arts district."

'Can I hold? Hey, I've got 40 days and 40 nights.'

Best Seller of All Times...The Holy Bible:'No fair. You're creating your own readers.'

"Its risk free, we've got Goliath"

'Noah, your arc ruse was a great success. This was the best feast ever.'

The first recorded case of overbooking: Noah having to leave the Unicorns behind.

Self raising Lazarus.

Man mistakes new ironclad warship for Noah's Ark

This is our great new cruise to the Middle East - 40 days and 40 nights.