Religion Geek Gifts

'Throw them out of the Garden of Eden - THAT'LL provide the proper economic incentives!:

"They're SUPPOSED to have a disparate impact!"

"What? You broke number 3 already?"

'You were great at 'Daniel in the Lion's Den!' -- I'd sure like to hear you do 'The Three Little Pigs' sometime!'

'Is there an E-Reader Edition?'

"The fourth horseman says that he will be late. He hasn't left the Old Testament yet."

"Excuse me, Reverend, but what, exactly, do you have to do to get a drink around here?"

The ecumenical dinner party.

10 Commitments? Sure, I guess I could give him those, too.

'You know, I never have had a sabbatical....'

"What did Jesus order?"

'Why did Moses wander in the desert for forty years?'

"Mark, you have to stop calling John's gospel 'Fan Fiction.'"

'I'll let your people go when they're fully pyramid-compliant!'

The Thinker. The Listener

"No, the Trinity is not the Father, The Son, and the Preacher's wife."

"There Adam. Isn't that a lot more comfortable than that silly little fig leaf?"

'Number three?', 'This is NOT a quiz!'

Sharing the Bed with Zeno

Moses parting the waves and trolleys appear on the sea bed!

'I was trying to extinguish my ego, and I got an Out of Memory Error.'

To monk showing book entitled 'Brand Spanking New Testament': "I think we may have to shorten the title."

Chill Out Worshippers!

'I don't get it, I've only served that guy water all evening.'

Diagram of a dark matter halo around a saint.

"'Thou shalt give good discounts'? That's a commandment?"

Catholic-Protestant Debates. . .

'He says he's tried sending you tweets but his cell phones keep melting.'

"Wouldn't it have been easier just to tweet those?"

"You're correct, God doesn't need your tithe, but the church does."

"Stupid HR says you can only fire them..."

'I believe you're thinking of leaving us, Brother?'

"Not only should science be Bible-based, Creationism, but also math, Roman numerals!"

Attila the Nun.

"Do me a favor, chief. Next time you carve something in stone have it spell checked first."