Bible Geek Gifts

Lice Moses

'Is there an E-Reader Edition?'

'It's really more of a family forest than a family tree.'

No, no, this is Terry's ark, Noah's is three arks down.

Adam names the animals (He puts sticky notes on them saying Shaz, Dave, Trish etc).

"You think two weeks in isolation is hard?"

"His name is James Tom Dave Jon Lee Robert Glenn Joseph Tony Sam Barnes. We didn't want to hurt any relatives' feelings by not naming him after them."

'Hey, wait a minute...Apples aren't indigenous to this geopraphical region.'

Welsh airport arrivals.

Ten Commandments

"Hurry! Let's go! The world will be better off without his kind."

"...We've traced your lineage all the way back to a 15th-century East European Count."

"The fourth horseman says that he will be late. He hasn't left the Old Testament yet."

'He's got your nose.'

The First Printed Bible

'Adam, you left the toilet rock up again!'

Noah's ark, many lions

Christian and Born again Christian...

'Well, there go all MY plans....'

"Wow, Jesus. That lesson rocked, someone should write this stuff down."

A likely story - lost his waterskis in a poker game !

'Number three?', 'This is NOT a quiz!'

"As a child of the pastor, did you stop and think that just because you can belch the books of the Bible, should you?"

Adam and Eve, as old people.

Meet the Author

'If you're omnipresent, why do I always have to climb way up here?'

'We had an Old Testament skit today. Al Sims was the Hittite, and I was the hittee.'

'Could you carve the Commandments in stone? -- otherwise they'll think I made them up.'

Jerry Springer of biblical times.

"Remember, God created you. Evolution will get you left behind."

'Please Miss, is it where Noah kept his bees?'

"Sure he's cute, Lord. . . He's just not what I had a mind for a companion!"

"Who wants to live in a Garden Centre?"

The Kids' Table at the Last Supper

'Let your people go? - after all the trouble I went to getting them full employment?'