Religion Nerd Gifts

'Just try to collect.'

'Pat's Pagan paperbacks and periodicals' next to 'Coleman's Christian bookshop'

Ascent of Machine.

"With less ice these days this provides better camouflage."

"They're SUPPOSED to have a disparate impact!"

'You were great at 'Daniel in the Lion's Den!' -- I'd sure like to hear you do 'The Three Little Pigs' sometime!'

The ecumenical dinner party.

'You know, I never have had a sabbatical....'

"Excuse me, Reverend, but what, exactly, do you have to do to get a drink around here?"

'Eve wants a second opinion about the apples.'

"What did Jesus order?"

Vaccine

'Why did Moses wander in the desert for forty years?'

"Mark, you have to stop calling John's gospel 'Fan Fiction.'"

'I'll let your people go when they're fully pyramid-compliant!'

'Okay, I see it now...lame in the third hind leg on the left side!'

"I get the strange feeling this has happened before."

"You looked a lot bigger on your dating profile."

"Nasty sunburn."

"Lord, thank you for guiding me through the whole 'evolution by natural selection' thing."

'Number three?', 'This is NOT a quiz!'

"No, the Trinity is not the Father, The Son, and the Preacher's wife."

"There Adam. Isn't that a lot more comfortable than that silly little fig leaf?"

Charles Darwin

"Of course you'll study Latin. How else will you learn the names of your dinosaur friends."

Moses parting the waves and trolleys appear on the sea bed!

Professor Swizzlestix explains his point....

Asteroid Denying Dinosaur vs. Asteroid Believing Dinosaur.

To monk showing book entitled 'Brand Spanking New Testament': "I think we may have to shorten the title."

'Our top theologians have studied the issue, Your Majesty, and they agree that you're damned if you do and damned if you don't.'

'But we just don't have the technology to carry it out.'

"My first Father's day!"