Quiz Host Gifts

Question - 'What does 'DVD' stand for?' Reply - 'Dick Van Dyke.'

"No conifering, please."

"The official measure of an inch is three iPhones stacked on top of each other."

'Exams are not like they were in my day.'

'Would you like me to take 'Mr & Mrs Smith' as your final answer?'

"My answers could be right. Your quiz just asked the wrong questions."

Academic Jeopardy ... 'What Was the Maiden Name of Dante Alighieri's Maternal Grandmother?'

"Now our contestant will try to guess which of you is the very last individual of your species."

Victoria's pre-marriage questionnaire continues...'Can I get input from the guys at the bar on this one?'

Before the Internet

Evolution Exam Results.

Well HERE'S some good news...Judgement Day has been replaced by a multiple choice questionnaire.

Senior Jeopardy!

Academic Jeopardy - "The great unknowns and cosmic uncertainties of the universe are reduced by this number daily."

"I'd like to buy a BOWEL."

Quiz for dogs.

Good Luck!

"How'd I do on the test?"

"I'm sorry, sir, but I've got to ask you another question. I heard someone in the courtroom shout out the correct answer."

'Number three?', 'This is NOT a quiz!'

"Our next contestant is Mildred and her specialist subject is "Other People's Business""

Tommy, Math quiz. It's one of his earliest pieces.

'What was Marx's theory of the origin of capital?'

"Yes, Donald, I know you didn't expect a test today... that's why it's called a pop quiz!"

"Percy Shattock, Page Three Girls...1979 to 1986."

'Number three?', 'This is NOT a quiz!'

"I've devised a new paternity test, or as I call it, a pop quiz."

To Be. Not To Be. All Of The Above. None Of The Above.

Investing 101 Acronym Test.

At the celebrity jobcentre...

"I wish I'd failed my 11 Plus too...."

"Next riddle without looking it up, can you tell me which is the routing number and which is the account?"

"If Shakespeare were alive today, he would be driving this make of Sports Utility Vehicle."

Bob Monkhouse

"Smart Arse"