Prison Drama Enthusiast Gifts

'I was just getting used to handling large sums of money.'

"Man, how did they ever catch you?"

The room service stinks.

Lawyer to prisoner- It's stopped raining, I'll be going,

'Thanks, but I don't need a lawyer. I'm going to tell the truth.'

'Yes, Frank, yes. That's how my body will fall when you kill me, and your laughter will echo down the corridors...'

"My problem is a recessive gene for honesty and a dominant gene for robbery."

"Hide the file in one of your gluten-free cakes – so the guards won't eat it."

Visitation Day at the Bug Jar

'She's promised to wait for me but I only hope her memory isn't what it was!'

'One of the guards is leaiving, would you like to make a contribution to his farewell gift?'

'When I said there was a thin person inside me screaming to get out, I didn't mean it LITERALLY!'

Prisoner decorating his cell.

Conrad Black will be unable to do his investment club's tax returns this year.

"How'd you know I was in for cyber crime?"

'Before you go to prison, Sims, I'd like to give you this award as 'Scapegoat of the Year'.'

'See, I told you it was a good idea to talk to the plants.'

"Murder one. How about you?" "I tried to rob an arts and crafts store with a hot glue gun."

'It's windy this morning.'

"This is Cliff. He's a neo-con."

'I'm getting into a rut -- campaign, election, indictment, parole... campaign, election, indictment, parole....'

Prison baseball game features Bankers vs. Wall Street.

Guys in torture chamber: 'TGIF!' and 'Shaddup.'

This gentleman would like to take his bird to see Alcatraz.

"I had everyone fooled. Could have got away with it, too, if he had just kept his big mouth shut."

"They want to spend the weekend at Daddy's" (Colour)

'Well, I'd best be off, Arthur, the clink of glasses behind bars and all that...'

"I got eight to twelve years, which was in line with Wall Street expectations."

'I'm in here for something I didn't do alright-I didn't pay my Council Tax!'

'It's amazing the change in his attitude since he took up knitting.'

'Don't worry, I didn't tell them anything they didn't already suspect.'

'Look on the bright side, think of all the money you saved by conducting your own defence.'

'When I first saw you on TV, I just knew you were innocent of stalking.'

Prison decorating

'Of course you can't remember what you had for breakfast -- we didn't HAVE any breakfast.'