Primate Admirer Gifts

Two old apes watch two young apes swinging in the trees - 'Brachiating?! Kids these days... whatever happened to good old fashioned swinging?!'

'What is important, is that not only has Koko the gorilla been taught basic sign language, but that she can use that knowledge to communicate meaningful and complex ideas.'

"The apes accepted you, but my sister's a whole other story."

"I disagree — I think humans are funny."

I'm with biped.

Animal Preserve. Director's Office. I've been demoted from the primate house to the bird sanctuary. You've been sent back to the Mynahs!

'Cool! Thanks to our opposable thumbs, we can send SMS messages...'

'No! Not cell phone! Not TV remote! Human! Human being!'

'These bugs ion your hair are simply delicious! where id you pick them up at?'

'True, but he doesn't smoke, drink, or chase other women!'

"He looks like becoming our first 'celebrity' gorilla!"

Gorilla in a zoo wears a t-shirt stating: Born To Be Wild.

'Of course he knows he's a monkey, Timmy. You know you're a monkey, don't you?'

"Roll your sleeves back down before someone notices. . . !"

'Dr Hodges, here, is from England and he's been observing us for 14 years. Mr Ferrell, an American, has been here only 3 weeks. Monique Corveu, from Paris, has practically been living with us for about nine years...'

'Take it from me and come back. The future is definitely on land.'

'Hang on a minute: What does 'IVF' mean?!'

Annie, the Reptile version: 'The sun will come out tomorrow! Tomorrow! You will sun yourself tomorrow!'

'The forest is so dark and gloomy: It's nice to reach the emergence and get a bit of sunshine...'

"Don't make me warn you again, monkey. Stay outa the curiosity racket."

A little bird told me...

"Looks like Harriet mixed her lights and darks again."

"I'd like a partridge in a pear tree, 2 turtle doves, 3 French hens, 4 calling birds and 7 swans a swimming."

Funky Facts: Monkeys.

Turtle Trailer Court

'I know that our nesting area is somewhere around here?'

At the primate speech center, Mokobo tries some stand-up comedy...

'I like scientists: They are genuinely interested in every mundane thing we do and keep detailed records...'

"Best project manager we ever had."

Giant Monkey sprays the pesty planes with 'fly spray'

'Typical man - why can't he just ask for directions?'

"Have you been throwing a lot of poop lately?"

'If only Darwin could have seen this.'

Polly, want a cracker, but Polly need a glass of wine.

Too much monkey business...