Primate Enthusiasts Gifts

You ever see a great action movie and then feel like the hero? How so? Y'know, you kind of pick up the hero's vibe for a couple of days. I guess. Why do you ask? Monkey and I saw King Kong last night. Thump thump thump thump. Under attack!

Primate Speech Institute. He's learned to talk, but all he'll talk about is the price of bananas.

'Take it from me and come back. The future is definitely on land.'

"I disagree — I think humans are funny."

At the primate speech center, Mokobo tries some stand-up comedy...

Funky Facts: Monkeys.

Too much monkey business...

"Have you been throwing a lot of poop lately?"

'Typical man - why can't he just ask for directions?'

'If only Darwin could have seen this.'

Just back from the psychological research center, Stanly couldn't help but think that he lived with a bunch of baboons.

A gorilla plays chess with his keeper.

'Look at those arms! I was born to ride a Harley Davidson!'

'Of course he knows he's a monkey, Timmy. You know you're a monkey, don't you?'

'Look, if we're going to make this business work, we need to stop eating all the stock.'

'My Dad will like you. He's the care-taker at the monkey house in the zoo.'

Ape ambushes anteater hiding behind a monolith.

"Stop smirking, it's just an expression! You know perfectly well what I mean when I say I'm putting my foot down and you can't go out tonight!"

"Don't disturb Daddy darling: he's just received his new issue of "Basic Tools Monthly"..."

"Oh crap, my mood ring!"

'Bernie, you're not gonna have anything disgusting to hurl at zoo visitors if you forget this.'

'I think we're losing sight of our roots.'

Swinging through the jungle.

Trump to Build Wall

"Sayyy - you've had some work done!"

'Brachiating?! Kids these days... whatever happened to good old fashioned swinging?!'

"...an this is my extended family."

"Promise I won't evolve into one of those, Ma."

"That's ridiculous. I do not have a superiority complex."

After Darwin - "I won't spoil it and tell you the ending."

'If you think using a stick is evolutionary, wait till you try one these dipped in chocolate.'

an ape is at therapy.The therapists says to him: 'Herbert, i'd like you to talk about your feelings just before one of your poo-flinging fits of rage.'

'You know, I'm appreciating having long arms more and more as I get older,,,'

"Is that 'good reptilian' or 'bad reptilian'?"

'Will frolic in trees, or whatever it is we do, for food.'