Precedent Ponderer Gifts

'Have you found a precedent? Yes, you did the same crime in 1974.'

'In this next precedent, an attorney lost his frivolous lawsuit complaint and his opponent then filed a frivolous 'frivolous lawsuit' lawsuit.'

Historical memory is on life support.

'Seriously, in this day and age, how can people still believe in this nonsense that we have evolved from microbes...?'

"Does anyone know where we keep the unwritten rules?"

Pre-Historic Gentleman's Duel

"Today we'll examine that age old question of robot accomplishment: programming or processor?"

Fish crawls from the primordial soup.

'Egad! It's the ghosts of sanity past!'

"It is just as the Oracle foretold!"

'I say we try it.'

"I think you're suffering from nostalgia, Mr. Prentice."

'Congratulations, you've got the job. Unfortunately though, you'll be constantly late, and we'll fire you in two months.'

"I'll have dessert first."

'He's always looking for an argument!'

History Department: 'I used to be a revisionist myself, you know!'

'The hardest part of being a street crazy is picking each day's sign.'

Fortune teller sees impending doom

'Turn your thinking cap around, Robert.'

'You'll be going on a long journey this Christmas.'

The End is Near.

Fish to friend regarding third fish leaving Precambrian ocean: 'There's been no living with him since he started to evolve.'

'So there's global warming. What possible harm could it do?'

'Do you ever wonder about this whole 'money' thing?'

A psychic predicts the discovery of gluten.

Are these sessions as soul-deadening for you as they are for me, doctor? Let's not have a contest, Al. Or, if we do, no wagering.

Bothers my conscience a little bit/May keep me up for a night or two/Am I really stooping this low?

A self-filling prophecy.

'Dang, that reminds me...I've gotta get back and post an entry on my blog.'

'And that's your idea of a desk calendar...'

'Knock the corners off that mate - and you've got the wheel.'

'The mind-body problem is best expressed in the formulation...OOf!'

'Nostradamus enjoyed singing in the tub'

Metamorphosis is coming.

Well at least we can handle these rocks.